Meaning and Purpose

This year it seems that I'm constantly being reminded about the meaning and purpose of life so I wanted to share some quotes that I've gathered from my book and online reads. Please note that these are all from a Catholic perspective.

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"So it may be said that the chief purpose of life for any one of us, is to increase according to our capacity our knowledge of God by all the means we have, and to be moved by it to praise and thanks." ~ J.R.R. Tolkien

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"My purpose is to become closely united to God through love, and my destiny is to praise and glorify God's mercy." ~ St. Faustina (729)

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Alicja Lenczewska: "Why am I still living?"
Jesus: "To learn to love Me and people even more."

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According to Arthur Brooks, "to find the meaning of your life is to seek coherence, purpose, and significance." He gave the following questions for guidance:

1. Why do things happen the way that they do in my life? (Coherence)
2. Why am I doing what I'm doing? Why am I moving in this direction? (Purpose)
3. Why does my life matter? (Significance)

Now imagine a Catholic answering those questions:

1. Why do things happen the way that they do in my life? Because this is what God wills.
2. Why am I moving in this direction? To get to Heaven.
3. Why does my life matter? Because the Lord loves me. I matter to God.

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"God has created me to do Him some definite service. He has committed some work to me which He has not committed to another. I have my mission. I may never know it in this life, but I shall be told it in the next. I am a link in a chain, a bond of connection between persons. He has not created me for naught. I shall do good; I shall do His work." ~ St. John Henry Newman

On health and peace of heart

I have never been comfortable being vulnerable, nor am I particularly good at expressing my feelings, but I wanted to talk about this at least once on this blog.

I’m one of those who developed anxiety during the pandemic. Although I have always been a nervous kid, I never imagined it could get worse. I’ve learned that I have become too comfortable with my way of life --- working from home, being surrounded by family, and having the comforts of life. I discovered I was weak, and that my faith needed some work.

2021 was brutal, at least for my nerves. We were flooded in April, and because of the damages, the family decided to elevate and renovate the house. I first noticed recurring palpitations and irregular heartbeat in June and had it checked.

In the following months, our living arrangement was, well, chaotic. It was not carefully planned before the construction commenced. And then it happened, I got covid in the last quarter of 2021, along with my sister. We were not allowed to stay in the house we were currently living in, but my sister was whisked off to a hotel managed by her employer while I had to go to a government facility. Our elderly parents were left to take care of the construction.

I really thought I would be fine because I was used to being on my own, but that was not the case. After a week inside the hotel room, I started having difficulty sleeping. I brought with me a blood pressure monitor and every day my bp and heart rate increased. Eventually, I started taking bp medicines. Because no doctor or nurse was allowed to see me, I asked to be transferred to a different facility, where nurses could monitor me and patients were allowed to go out of their rooms.

While inside the isolation facility, I also developed numbness throughout my body especially on the head, shoulders, and back, which made it even harder to sleep. It was only after I got out that I was able to get medicines to help relieve the symptoms...

Fast forward to today, I am still on my healing journey. While the world is back to normal, I lag behind trying to remember how it felt like before, trying to regain my health physically, mentally, and emotionally. But I have hope. I understand that events, people, and things that may make me nervous or scared will always be there. It is my inner disposition, how I react to these triggers, that is important.

Picture Jesus sleeping on the boat in the midst of a storm—an image of interior peace that can only be acquired through absolute confidence in God's providence. That kind of interior peace is my prayer, not just for me, but for all. It may take us a lifetime to get there, but, no worries. :)

“It is not the exterior circumstances that must change; it is above all our hearts that must change. They must be purified of their withdrawal into themselves, of their sadness, of their lack of hope: Happy are the pure in heart; they shall see God (Matthew 5:8). Happy are those whose hearts are purified by faith and hope, who bring to their lives a view animated by the certitude that, beyond appearances to the contrary, God is present, providing for their essential needs and that they lack nothing.” ~ Father Jacques Philippe (Searching for and Maintaining Peace)

Help me pray for all people struggling with anxiety. May God grant us the grace to look forward with hope and wonder!

♡ Julienne

Netflix Take Two

The last time I tried Netflix was to watch the Gilmore Girls revival in 2016. With that free month, I was also able to watch Sherlock and some Doctor Who episodes, among others.

Last August, I was offered the free month again and would not have signed up if not for the movie To All the Boys I've Loved Before. Whereas in 2016 I only played on a laptop, this time I tried it on the television, which I found out was not a good idea because then I got hooked. My watch list reached more than 50 films and series. How could I watch all of that within the free month? So, yeah, in the end I continued my subscription.

Caiaphas, A.D. The Bible Continues

The best thing I got from it yet was A.D. Kingdom and Empire a.k.a. The Bible Continues. I've always loved Biblical films and was usually updated on new releases, but this one I was not familiar with. It might be because I did not bother to watch Son of God or The Bible miniseries for the sole reason that I was not "feeling" the actor playing Christ. So I watched the series with my father, and with no expectations whatsoever.

AD is a continuation of The Bible miniseries. It depicts the events after the death of Christ and follows three groups of people: Pilate and the Romans, Caiaphas and the Pharisees, and the Disciples. It is based on the Acts of the Apostles, which is a term to mean some liberties were taken to add or subtract from the book. That's how films usually are.

The best part of this series was how the characters were presented. They cast actors of different nationalities and colors, which was fine, although I admit it sometimes distracted me from the story.

Pilate, who is usually portrayed somewhat fair, was in this a very cruel man. I've read that his character followed what real historical accounts of him are saying. Then there was Caiaphas, who was a person torn between the Roman law, the law of Moses, and the safety of his people. Couple that with a great actor and you've got a very intriguing character that will make you feel for him. Peter was also a highlight and maybe one of the best portrayals I've seen so far. His costume though... I couldn't take my eyes off his legs. Out of all people there, he was the only one wearing a tunic that hangs above his knees!

Saul before conversion

My favorite in this, however, is Saul. The only other time I've seen a Saul or Paul in a film was in a late 90s miniseries called St. Paul. Looking back through YouTube videos, the 90s Saul was a bit muted compared to THIS Saul. In AD, Saul was scarily strong-willed, harsh, intelligent, full of conviction, extremely passionate about his beliefs, and zealous about his cause you could feel his hate of the Christians in your bones. In other words, the perfect candidate for a leader and preacher. Credits must go to the man who played him, Irish actor Emmett J. Scanlan.

Then I found out AD was cancelled years ago... oh well. Too bad.

The second good thing about Netflix is the wide range of series related to Architecture, Design, Real Estate, Gardening, and Food. It's a haven of informative lifestyle shows you can play anytime or in the background while doing something else. Compared with having cable at home, I think Netflix is a cheaper and better alternative. (But that's just me convincing myself that I made the right decision.)

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P.S. Look, I even found these books in a secondhand bookstore!

Gangsta Issues

At Church today, the woman in front of me let her son play on her mobile while the priest was having his homily. The boy played with volume, so I told him to turn the volume down. I really, really, really don't like it when this happens. It makes me mad and sad at the same time. I can't count how many times I have reprimanded people, especially kids and teenagers who are playing with their mobile phones on masses.

So I sat back on my seat, then see the lady beside me texting! Riiiight...Was it okay I surrendered?

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Yesterday, I received an email from my American client. So she finally heard about the president, unfortunately she thought he was scary. So I wrote her an email, my first long one, to explain what's really happening here. It was my first defense of the president, and hopefully the last. It's getting harder by the day to defend him. I just wish he would stop talking.

She sent her reply this morning. She liked the long exchange and said it made her know me a little better. :)

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I love this rare photo of them laughing. Precious!

MUSIC. I had a 90s RnB and Hip hop September! I had on repeat music by Color Me Badd and Bone Thugs-n-Harmony. In fact I'm still under the BTNH spell, immersing myself with their life stories and music. There's this exhaustive, not to mention extremely long, article about BTNH's history called MACHETES DIPPED IN RUM: The Oral History of Bone Thugs-n-Harmony. It's so worth checking out! I also watched this documentary, TV One's Unsung on Bone Thugs-N-Harmony.

New York Undercover

Actually, the reason I got the BTNH bug was because of TV One's Unsung series, the Hollywood version. I saw this Unsung Hollywood episode about New York Undercover, the TV series I used to watch on ABC 5 (now TV 5 in the Philippines) mid-90s. I forgot how much I loved that show! Then, while I was browsing Unsung's other episodes, I found the feature on BTNH.

Flying Beings

The other night I had this dream. It was long, one of those adventure types, and the last thing I could remember was that I was in this large building with a very high ceiling. Someone was with me, a classmate from high school, but she was just there. I couldn't recall anything that she did. So it was at the end of that long dream that the scene in the large building happened.

People or 'beings' gradually came into view. I don't know much about dream sequences, but sometimes transitions just don't happen. And this was one of those times. These beings appeared, and they were flying, like a flock of birds, only they looked vaguely human. Usually when events like this happen in my dreams, I get scared and try to walk away. But this time, while the feeling of fear was still there, there was a feeling of wonder as well. So I took out my phone instead and recorded them on video. They flew from end to end, then dived right above my head. I also caught them on camera hanging around my companion, although curiously these beings on the ground can't be seen by the naked eye.

That was the dream, or at least the end of it before I woke up. It was something that I would have forgotten if not for the Bible reading that day, that's why I am writing this here.

July 9, 2016 Saturday
First Reading: Isaiah 6:1-8

In the year King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord seated on a high and lofty throne, with the train of his garment filling the temple. Seraphim were stationed above; each of them had six wings: with two they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with two they hovered.

One cried out to the other: “Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of hosts! All the earth is filled with his glory!” At the sound of that cry, the frame of the door shook and the house was filled with smoke.

Then I said, “Woe is me, I am doomed! For I am a man of unclean lips, living among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the Lord of hosts!” Then one of the seraphim flew to me, holding an ember which he had taken with tongs from the altar.

He touched my mouth with it. “See,” he said, “now that this has touched your lips, your wickedness is removed, your sin purged.”

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? Who will go for us?” “Here I am,” I said; “send me!”

The text below is from the Meditation that accompanied the readings:

Anyone who encounters the Lord is both attracted to Him and yet afraid. We are drawn to Him, for our hearts sense that this is what we are made for, that this mysterious, beautiful, merciful, personal Presence is what we long for -- and yet we also know instinctively that we are not like Him, and we are unworthy to be in His Presence. (The Anawim Way, Liturgical Meditations)

Davao Catholic Herald Website

Hello there, I'm back. I have been quite busy the past month, most of that time spent revamping Davao Catholic Herald's website. This is volunteer work that hopefully I could persevere in because I've been waiting for an opportunity to work for the Church all my life. I tried or thought about doing catechesis, but any job that needs a lot of speaking is really not my thing. Then there's the church choir, but I find the songs too high or too low for my voice. So, when my father told Fr. Gamaya, the paper's editor-in-chief, that I was signing up for the web development, he was delighted. I finally found the right role for me.

In case you were wondering, the site uses a customized Gonzo WordPress theme.

Gary Cherone: Words & Music

I love it when rock stars go against the status quo.

Cherone

Eddie Vedder, lead singer of Pearl Jam and a personal favorite of mine because of his solo work, is a vocal pro-choice activist. He had this to say about abortion:

"I feel like I know every angle of this issue," said Eddie Vedder. "I know the adoption angle; I know what it's like to be fifteen and be in a situation and have to make a decision. Terminating pregnancy is not an easy thing." —Eddie Vedder, Rolling Stone 11/12/98 #799

I'm a fan of his music, but that's about it. And since I'm not very good with words, it is a great relief that another man of the rock world took a different stand. Gary Cherone, lead singer of the band Extreme of More Than Words fame, wrote two open letters to Vedder. This one below is a reply to Vedder's quote above:

What About the 98.6 Degree Angle?

Another Letter to Eddie Vedder

by Gary Cherone
 
The vast majority of people who support abortion
take that position with the firm conviction
that life does not begin at conception
That being said...

If one personally felt "terminating pregnancy is not an easy thing"
but was the right of the individual to make that "decision"

Is the life within the mother's womb a human person?

If the answer is no, it is not a human person
Why would one feel it "is not an easy thing" to do?

If the answer is yes, it is a human person
Why would one advocate "terminating" it?

If the answer is I don't know, if it is, or isn't a human person
How many more "decision(s)"
would one make in an uncertain "situation"?

If the unborn is not a human person
No justification for abortion is necessary
However...
If the unborn is a human person
No justification for abortion is adequate.

Nearly all arguments for abortion
are based on the faulty premise
that the unborn are not fully human.

Respectfully,
Gary Cherone
(1/22/2001)

 ***

The first open letter also in full below. I really like the way it's written, its rhythm and words, much like good music.

An Open Letter to Eddie Vedder

When is a woman not a woman?

Therein lies the only clear refutation of a woman’s rights.
A woman’s rights —
seems a mere tautology, a redundant catch phrase.
Are not rights self evident?
Intrinsic assumptions of the inalienable?
So, when is a woman not a woman,
a right not a right?

When she doesn’t exist.

When does a woman become a woman?

Is it when
her first ballot has been cast?
Or when
she graduates from her class?

Is it when
she makes a wish on her sweet sixteenth?
Would I be amiss if it were her first kiss?

Is it when
she’s diagnosed by the boy next door?
Or as ambiguous as the cutting of the cord?

Is it the time
it takes to travel the distance through the canal?
Or when
she’s kicking and becomes viable?

Is it when
her sex is discovered by a sonogram?
Or after eight weeks when
the changes in her body will be mainly in dimension?

Is it when
her brain waves are detected after 40 days?
Or is it around three weeks when
her primitive heart beats?

Can there be only one true line of demarcation?
One finite measurable point in time that differentiates
life from non-life?
Womanhood from non-womanhood?
Rights from no right?

Is it the moment of conception —
that point when all of the above is set in motion?
That precise moment when
"a separate human individual, with her own genetic code,
needing only food, water, and oxygen, comes into existence"?

Indeed,
It is at that point,
"like the infant, the child, the adolescent,
that the conceptus is a being who is becoming,
not a becoming striving toward being.

She is not a potential life,
she is a life with great potential".
She is not the mother,
she is an other —
a somebody other than the mother.

A woman,
however beautiful, however complex when fully grown,
begins life as a single cell, a zygote —
that stage in human development through which we all pass.
She fulfills "the four criteria necessary to all life —
metabolism, growth, reaction to stimuli, and reproduction.
Her genetic makeup is established at conception,
determining to a great extent
her own individual, physical characteristics":
her eyes, her hair, her skin color, bone structure, her gender.

So let us not be confused,
"she did not come from a zygote — she once was a zygote.
She did not come from an embryo, she once was an embryo.
She did not come from a fetus, she once was a fetus".
She did not come from a little girl — she once was a little girl.

When is a woman not a woman?
The answer is absolute, non-negotiable.
To argue against would be to ignore the innate,
the fact of the matter.
The answer can never be a matter of opinion or choice.
This is not a metaphysical contention.
This is biology 101.
The answer is scientifically self-evident —
as inherent as the inalienable.

Therefore,
the ability to pursue happiness
is contingent upon liberty —
her liberty,
and her freedom is solely dependent upon
the mother of all human rights...

the right of life.

Respectfully,
Gary Cherone
(June 1999)

***

All of this is a result of listening to Extreme's music for a whole week!

Credits to Libertarians for Life and Rock for Life.

Website: Dominican Sisters of the Trinity Davao

My aunt, Sister Annabelle, requested a new website for the Dominican Sisters of the Trinity's Center for Justice & Peace. I used GeoCities for their old site, and fortunately, although GeoCities is no more, we can still view it here thanks to the web archive project of geocities.ws. Also shown here are some of the Center's products, made to order cards and bracelets.

Sunset at Our Lady of Lourdes

Our Lady of Lourdes, Bangkal

The pointed arch. I remember this from the Pillars of the Earth episode we watched last night.

Our Lady of Lourdes Church @ Bangkal, Davao City

Magellan's Cross

Cebu, just beside Basilica del Sto. Niño and in front of the City Hall

Basilica del Sto. Niño - Cebu

the oldest Church in the Philippines.

the altar and ceiling

This is a Church people flock to even when there's no mass. :)
And I brought the wrong lens for this batch so no wide shots :(

Palm Sunday

In celebration of Palm Sunday...
This is a big occasion here in the Philippines. After our palm branches (lukay) are blessed, we hang them on doors or windows.

First Visita Iglesia

Exactly one month ago, I had my first visita iglesia, with my mother, on my birthday hehehe. And I took some pictures... Happy Easter!!!

Five Davao City Churches...

Both of these from St. Joseph's

Carmelite

Redemptorist

St. Jude. There was a wedding when we got there.

San Pedro Cathedral. I'm proud of this one.
This church has endured so much...huge fire, bombings and it's still standing.
Thank God for that!

Monte Cristo vs. Jean Valjean

I just read The Count of Monte Cristo and the whole time I was comparing (or contrasting) Dantes (Monte Cristo) to Jean Valjean of Les Miserables. There are points of comparison and contrast for both characters.

Setting: 19th century France

Both were imprisoned. Monte Cristo was not guilty. Jean Valjean was guilty.
Both got out of prison.
After prison, both got rich. And both had hidden treasures to support them.
Both were influenced by a priest (and faith).

But while Jean Valjean was aiming towards reform and his salvation, Monte Cristo was plotting revenge against his enemies.

This was the part that got me confused. This hero (though more of an antihero really), played god. With his knowledge, power and wealth, he destroyed all his enemies, though he planned it so he himself would not do the act. You can say he was disguised as an angel. Then after all the evil he has done, he sought for a sign from God that what he did was right. Should I admire this character? Well all I know is he's no Jean Valjean.

Pope John Paul II

Last Sunday, I had the opportunity to watch the movie Pope John Paul II. The last time I've read about this movie was when I researched about The Princess Bride, which starred Cary Elwes. It's all on IMDB, so on Cary Elwes's page, I found this title and he played the younger Karol Wojtyla. When my father told me the Church was going to play a John Paul II movie in the cinema, I had the feeling it would be the one with Cary. I was right!

The movie was very informative and, quite unexpectedly, fun to watch. I liked the portrayals of Cary (who was always the prince and now a Pope) and Jon Voight, whom I'll always remember as a villain in movies (wait, I recall he played a President). The Pope's transformation from healthy and athletic to someone who can barely move, walk and talk was impressively captured by Voight.

From that movie, I realized that JP II is somewhat similar to our beloved companion, Gandalf: the old age, wisdom, a playful or childlike nature and, of course, a staff (hehehe). He's a real-life Gandalf, someone you can always turn to for teachings, support, companionship, courage, adventure, love.

Condemned for doing nothing

We have an African priest and I've heard him thrice now. It's a different experience listening to him, and when I do, I have to wear my glasses so I could see him clearly. It helps me understand what he says better given his accent and all.

He's a teacher and a good one, too. You don't usually take notes when listening to a sermon in a Catholic Church, but this priest makes me grab my pen and paper. I tell you, he gives loads of information in his speech that I gasp every now and then. Add to it his singing, yes, and during his sermon! He uses song lyrics as examples and sings them out. That's authentic African singing live for free!

He is Father Pascal.

The other Sunday, the Gospel reading was Luke 16:19-31. It was about a rich man named Lazarus and a poor man. Lazarus, who was sent to hell, didn't understand why he was there. He believed he didn't do anything wrong. Father Pascal said he was condemned for doing nothing. That was it: he didn't do anything. He could have done something to help the poor man who was right under his nose, yet he didn't. Instead it was the poor man who ended up in heaven.

Lazarus was neither cold nor hot (See Revelations 3:16); Neither an unbeliever who remains cold to a faith nor a believer who takes God's love seriously. He was one of those who seek only comfort and stability in this material world.

I remember in the Penitential Rite, in the earlier part of a mass, we recite this confession: "I confess to Almighty God... that I have sinned through my own fault... in what I have done (that is, my sins), and in what I have failed to do (this is the sin of omission)..."

I am writing this to remind myself that I could always do something.

Resolutions

Who says you need to wait for New Year to make resolutions? The time is now.

"Now! Return to your noble life now. Don't let yourself be fooled. 'Now' is not too soon... nor too late."

"Tomorrow! Sometimes it is prudence, many times it is the adverb of the defeated."

These are the words of Blessed Josemari­a Escriva from his book "The Way". He talks about resolutions like it is very much related with time. And I've realized that it is... that's why resolutions are so hard to fulfill just as time is very difficult to manage especially with people as lazy as me.

But the good news.
Yes there's hope for us slackers. "Make FEW resolutions. Make SPECIFIC resolutions. And fulfill them with the help of God." Again, FEW and SPECIFIC. That wouldn't be too hard, would it?

What did he mean by specific? Blessed Josemari­a gave an example. If I say "I want to be a saint," that would be a "broad and vague assertion." The goal has to be clear and simple, like "to attend Mass every Sunday" instead.

Now if you have your list, add this up:

"To recall, when you receive honors and praise, everything that brings you shame and embarrassment. The shame and embarrassment are yours; the praise and the glory are God's."